So your sister’s birthday is coming up and you still don’t know what to get her? If you’re a putz like me, you can buy her a Balenciaga handbag and some expensive name-brand sandals. Or you can be a man (or manly woman) and buy her a gift that means something, from the heart, or gets you off; whatever. Like a pair of high-end headphones!

Get in line girls, there's enough of me for everyone!

Though it’s not quite as advertised like an Air Jordan collection, or recognized by the female demographic as a fashion statement like carrying a Coach wallet; headphone fashion is in, and is here to stay. Headphone frenzies have been around since well before the 90s, and perhaps predates Reaganomics, though I’m not too sure about any of what I have said. But, I do know that geeks as well as other Japanese icons have caught on to the fact that headphones are sexy. After all, they even released a compiled artbook/catalogue featuring girls (with headphones) submitted by various artists. Some even the average Japanese fan would recognize. ABe Yoshitoshi ring any bells? How about Asaki Takayuki? Still lost? Well, even a loser should know Kurogane Ken— Oh come on! You guys suck.

Well, anyways, what people don’t realize is that it while Shin Moeru Headphone Tokuhon was published in 2008, there was an Autumn 2007 doujinshi that predates it called, oddly enough, Moeru Headphone Tokuhon. It features all of the same headphones and artwork that the 2008 version has, with the only difference being that the girl with the audio-technica ATH-W5000 is wearing a gown in the 2007 version. There’s also less headphones in the 2007  version, which should come as no surprise.

You can also find this under the dust flap of the 2008 version.

In any case, in addition to warming your ears on cold winter days, and making you look pretentious, did you know that headphones serve a secondary purpose? That is, listening to anime music! This handy guidebook breaks it down for your reading pleasure to help you choose the best headphone for your brand of music, which for most of us would probably be something gay like Gackt. Fortunately for me, the team behind moeru headphones likes normal anime pop… That was sort of an oxymoron, wasn’t it?

Looks neat doesn't it?

The first is Energy Balance, from Low to High. I also have no idea what they’re talking about. The one below that is the feel of the material from soft to hard. Then below that, we have the various evaluation scores for music through the headphones for different genres: Orchestra, Jazz, Rock and Pop (Anime). You don’t have to be good at math to know that ten is higher than nine and nine is higher than eight. Just use common sense here.

The chart to the right, Ongaku Keikou Hyouka, is what really threw me off… Since I still don’t know what Onjou-kan stands for… Starting from 12:00 clockwise: Comfort, Granularity, Range, Cost/Performance Ratio, Sound Field, and Noise-Cancellation.

There are some headphones that go as high as 2100USD$, and cheap ones that range around 100. If you’re not big into forking over money like I am for that two minutes of happiness, my suggestion would be to settle for what looks best. After all, most people don’t carry 1500 dollar amplifiers with them while listening to lossless audio on their iPods. Personally, I like the Panasonic RP-HTX7’s. They’re really cheap and look good. They don’t perform so well, but they suit my daily needs. I also plan on buying a Sony MDR-7506Pro soon. I’ve already ordered an Ultrasone Proline 900. Neither of them are in the above catalogue so I don’t know how good they’ll be, but I’m hoping for the best.

Well, good luck and happy shopping to all those who want their sister to join the ranks of cool people like me.